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Keeping It Together While Breaking Up

A break-up can be one of the most painful and challenging experiences that life throws at you. Fortunately, this transition can be navigated more smoothly by heading a few easy tips. Read on to learn what you can do to ease the distress and turmoil of breaking up.

1.      Lean on your support system.
2.      Embrace alone time.
3.      Sit with your emotions without judgement.
4.      Know your intentions before you act.
5.      Reach out to a Lotus Counseling Center therapist for guidance.

Lean on your support system. Discussing your hardship with others can enable you to process and create meaning from your experiences. Finding a way to harness emotional support from those who care about you can lessen the hefty emotional load of a breakup and help you to see outside perspectives. Keep in mind that family and friends are meant to be there for you during tough times as well as happy ones.

Embrace alone time. Temporarily muting external noise can help you become more attuned to your needs, allowing you to best figure out what you can do to care for yourself as you heal.  This could mean detoxing from social media, taking a day off from work, or avoiding contact with your ex. Instead of focusing exclusively on missing someone else, begin to look forward to re-acquainting with yourself again. Discovering how to love yourself will pay off because no one can know how to love you better than you do!

Sit with your emotions without judgment. One misconception that can cause undue distress is the belief that some emotions are wrong or negative. On the contrary, it is common for momentous life changes, such as parting ways with a significant other, to be emotionally charged in confusing and sometimes contradictory ways. Provide yourself space to grieve for your loss, feel angry or frustrated, or even relieved without judging whether your feelings are "good" or "bad." Instead, be kind to yourself by utilizing care and compassion.

Know your intentions before you act. Breakups can arouse or amplify pre-existing insecurities, and people are more likely to act impulsively under stress. Before acting, ask yourself what you hope to gain and why. Acknowledging the intent behind your actions may deter you from engaging in self-destructive behaviors that are fueled by distress.

Reach out to a Lotus Counseling Center therapist for guidance. Beginning therapy with a well-trained therapist, which Lotus Counseling Center can amply provide, promotes understanding and healing post-breakup. A therapist can work with you to shed light on your relationship patterns and clarify what you want from the future. Therapy is an especially crucial step if you find that your current support system is lacking. Don’t be shy; our therapists are here to help!

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